I used to be a nonbeliever. I used to think it could not be; but when it happened, so quickly it hit me in my face and now I’m in love. Can’t you see that it does? It does; I believe that it does; I know that it does. It does exist. Glad I found my soul.
-LaJon

Part I of this post can be found here: “Does Exist – Part I”

The change of emotion in his words confused me, and my heart began to race. I had no idea where this could be coming from. Without me having the slightest hunch about what the “news” was, he continued on. “Talking to him really made me realize what we have, and I’ve come to the realization that
I love you.“

I’ve always known that Mr. Man has been slow to trust and even slower to love. Since that day, the entire magnitude of our relationship has changed. Where we used to think for I or me, we now think for us and we. The man of mystery that I somehow adored for so long finally let his true colors shine through. The Mr. Man I once knew never showed emotion unless he was forced to. He was a “sit on the dock of the bay” kind of character – word to Otis. But this new guy, he sweeps me off my feet every single day. Of course we’re human, so we’re not exempt to occasional quarrels or disagreements. But by the end of each one, the love we share for one another grows even stronger. I thought I’d been in love before. But now, I can honestly say I truly know what love is. Knowing I’m his “heart and soul” – as he says it – makes every ounce of worry and concern I had before disappear. The shadow of constant doubt that was created from our rough and abrupt break-up has finally been illuminated. He’s not only my love, but my best friend.

Regular phone conversations and Skype dates compensate for the distance; but the time between visits kills us softly. “Closets” have been cleaned and future plans about a ceremony and tykes have been discussed. I thought about why I waited on something that wasn’t exactly promising. Besides being stupid and crazy, I’ve never been one to give up on something I really want. Sometimes things that can’t be explained at the time, have best results at the end.

I had considered the thought before, but now I know he’s the one. I know he’s the soul I’ve been searching for; and I’m glad I finally found him.

Visit www.IAmLaJon.com for “Does Exist” and his debut EP, “Definition of Lovers Lost.”

“I’m searching for a soul – gentle and pure. Will I ever find her? How can I be sure? I’m searching with my heart. Yes I wear it on my sleeve, cause it bears so many scars. Yes the world has made me bleed.”
-LaJon

 For the longest time I found myself adoring Mr. Man, but not quite sure if he felt the same for me. He’s never been one to wear his heart on his sleeve, and I felt as though maybe I was the only one in “our” relationship. Our time spent together was always phenomenal and he was always so affectionate and caring. In long distance relationships, that isn’t always enough. I’m sure most women like me agree that we need to hear it; it’s not enough for men to assume that we already know. But I never considered giving up; even though I was full of uncertainty, I knew in my heart that with him was where I needed to be.

After another extended trip, we were back in Tampa. And before I knew it, we were back to the same venue from NYE – arguing. It was like the ‘Curse of Prana Nightclub & The Hotdog Stand.” With past arguments, I’m always the one to let it go so that we can move on. But this time, I was completely over it and I was putting my foot down. We loaded the bus with still no words exchanged. We arrived back to the hotel and he’d yet to confront me or the issue. Night became morning, and I was beginning not to worry – but to get more upset. All I wanted was an apology; an acknowledgement for the way he made me feel. Stopping for lunch, he finally made the initial effort and apologized for his words and actions; and I finally admitted to my own. Amazingly enough, hearing a close friend dwell on the serious issues in his relationship, made Mr. Man grasp how minute and minuscule our’s were. It was just enough to make him realize he really had something good.

When we finally made it back to Georgia, he told me we needed to talk but it would have to wait until we made it home. Within five seconds tops, I became a Negative Nancy. I’d convinced myself that he was ending things once again, but needed somewhere to run if things got physical. We made it home and he had me sit down. “We argued a lot this weekend,” was how he chose to start the conversation. That somber intro sealed the deal for me, and I was beginning to prepare to end my night wallowing in my sorrows. He then continued with, “…which is fine.” Little did I know his next words would indeed seal the deal, but not the one I had in mind..

.To.Be.Continued.

Visit www.IAmLaJon.com for “Does Exist” and his debut EP, “Definition of Lovers Lost.”