I Don’t Know Why, But I Do

Maybe I’m amazed by the way you know just what to say every time you look at me that way, or touch my face, or call my name. I can’t help myself. I never fell under a spell. I never felt the way I feel about you. I don’t know why, but I do.
-Chrisette Michele

Just like every other time, he caught me just as I was about to jump. I don’t know how he always seems to catch me just in the nick of time, but he does. I took a deep breath, found my nerve, and answered the call. He gave a try at initiating some small talk, and it was rejected instantaneously. I needed him to know that I was serious and that this talk was crucial. “So…how does this work?” Typical Mr. Man. He’d always been the one to avoid talking about his feelings and claimed that he “didn’t know how to.” With not a drop of cheer in my tone, I told him my thoughts and feelings were provided over a week ago, and that it was his turn to talk. Even though it was over a month ago, it still brings a girlish grin to face to this day. Because from the moment his heart began to pour, the wall of my frustration started to tumble.

There is just something about you. I don’t know what it is. It’s just…….something that I can’t explain. Before now, I wasn’t looking for a relationship. I was just doing me; and then you came along and that all changed. We always seem to just, happen. I love talking to you and I love spending time with you. I see a lot of potential for us and no, there’s no one else. I won’t go into details because I don’t want that pressure on us, but I even talk to my boys about you and our future – and that’s huge for me. I can be myself around you. I feel like I can talk to you about anything. You’ve become one of my best friends.

And there I was again – in a whirlwind of love and ecstasy. This time it was different though. I had no doubts, no questions, and no suspicions – only happiness and joy. It felt so good to be so elated by knowing my feelings were mutual, and that we were in it together this time. He gave no explanation for why he left before and I no longer had the desire to know. What’s meant to be, requires no explanation. It’s “us” and “we,” not “I” and “me” – and that was all I needed to know.

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